help. things are getting crazy in here.
last week i got bomabarded with work. presentations coming up already, and i am so behind in my readings & tutorials. partly cos i just got the textbooks? but mostly cos i am such a lazy lardass. i actually went for class without a textbook! with a blank sheet of paper to get answers! and i was late again! ended up with The Seat. you know, the one which the tutor likes turning to and making eye contact with the person in it.
oversleeping be bane of me. on friday i woke up late and missed lecture. not too bad cos there's a webcast for that. BUT i had to be late for thai class which was right after and i got locked out cos the fucking door is so weird! i struggled with the door, got violent with it, and it burst open! yay! except i thought i was entering by the back door, but turned out it was the front door! omg i wanted to stab myself. my friend nic was right at the back and it was impossible to get through the rows of ppl (very big class) and i was too embarrassed to go out by the front and enter by the back again (can u imagine if the back door jammed??). so i ended in The Seat again. this time even better, right beside the overhead projector which was blasting hot air! why the hell were we using an OHP anyways!
one bright spot, dinner at fong's was awesome! chung insisted they cooked the obviously store bought chicken (uh..okaay). lazed around, laughed at people's xangas, stalked ppl on facebook haha.. love my teammates!! they were like the funnest part of my hols too i think <333
went off to meet the uni classmates for icecream for awhile. ugh i hate swensons. overpriced and tastes like something my sister makes. then mom called to yell. so i had to get home. then on the cab she called to yell again. like wtf. then they locked me out. ASSES. but i used an umbrella to hook the keys over HAHA and i ran up really quietly to my room and they didnt even know i was home THERE I OUTSNEAKED those sneakies. NO WONDER THEY ARE MARRIED. i am still so pissed off. i know the hols are over but it was friday, ok?
so today, i had a game at 12. had to get there by 1040. which means i have to leave home at 930. and be up by 910. 915 if we rush it. when i woke, it occured to me that it was a little too warm in there to be 9. checked my phone and it was bloody ONE FIFTEEN. i almost wet my bed. got pissed that i didn't hear the alarm (happens) and then i realised i didn't even set the alarm!!! i forgot to cos i was too mad last night and i just kinda fell asleep fuming.
i actually slept past a frigging game. what the hell. there's game tomorrow again and i am gonna bloody set like 3 alarm clocks.
and i am still so flooded with schoolwork.. and tmr's softball day i'm gonna get close to zero done?? i don't know. i really really feel bad when i am late for stuff cos it's like disrespectful?? plus it's really annoying. i am acknowledging that i have a problem here :(
this is my extremely belated new year's resolution I WILL BE ON TIME
this is week 3 of school and i am already stressing out :( there's so much going on. family friends school hall club. farewells, meetups. at least league is ending soon so i can have my weekends free.
i dunno what i am doing sometimes SIGH it's like all my friends kinda know what they want and the can direct their energy towards it like a strong gush of water but here i am meandering round like a loser river. see, that's what school does to me.
imma go listen to warwick avenue and emo..though i am feeling vaugely happy now.. shit i dont even know why
wong out
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Friday, August 29, 2008
when i get to warwick avenue
brand new semester. yes i am only counting this week cos this is when tutorials start. i am taking NO LAUGHING thai. a very strange language. but i like strange.
this is transition transition all the way. i still don't know what i want.
major fun times the past coupla weeks. stayovers. staying out all night. staying up all night.
but i am afraid of the inevitable emo times coming up.
i've already met most of the people i'll be having classes with. of course, there's no escaping the usual idiots who make it their duty to provide a variety of smartass comments. there just has to be one of those in every class huh.
the idiot will somehow position himself (YES USUALLY A HE) somewhere in the middle of the room so that everyone gets a good view of his (USUALLY FAT) ass. he then tries his hardest to play the rebel by sighing loudly when the tutor explains something slightly too complex for his non-existant mind/ saying shit like ' wa i better drop this module already la'. YES ASSHOLE DROP THE MODULE AND GIVE US ALL A BREAK.
it's perfectly fine to make such comments from time to time. i mean school isn't exactly easy peasy. everyone makes such comments. that's why the idiot tries to be like everyone else and starts commenting too, except he doesnt know when to stop. (cos he's like socially retarded or something). which makes me wanna bash his head in. plus it's really annoying cos you know he thinks he is so fucking witty. then somehow idiot will manage to find a seat beside a nice quiet girl. he proceeds to try and make her laugh (he probably read somewhere that girls like funny guys). and because she's nice she pretends to laugh a little at his painful jokes. which pushes him into furthur delusion that he is actually funny. and he thinks, 'hey i think i stand a chance with this chick. now, all i have to do is make her laugh harder and maybe she will go out with me'. which is none of my business of course, except that he says his jokes/witty comments just loud enough for the whole room to hear, while acting like he totally didnt mean for anyone else to hear him. NO SUBTLETY MUCH??
and it's bearable if idiot happens to sit in front of me. i just kick his chair really hard. but obviously, this is rarely the case. pardon the angst. i just lost my matric card.
feel my love
wong
this is transition transition all the way. i still don't know what i want.
major fun times the past coupla weeks. stayovers. staying out all night. staying up all night.
but i am afraid of the inevitable emo times coming up.
i've already met most of the people i'll be having classes with. of course, there's no escaping the usual idiots who make it their duty to provide a variety of smartass comments. there just has to be one of those in every class huh.
the idiot will somehow position himself (YES USUALLY A HE) somewhere in the middle of the room so that everyone gets a good view of his (USUALLY FAT) ass. he then tries his hardest to play the rebel by sighing loudly when the tutor explains something slightly too complex for his non-existant mind/ saying shit like ' wa i better drop this module already la'. YES ASSHOLE DROP THE MODULE AND GIVE US ALL A BREAK.
it's perfectly fine to make such comments from time to time. i mean school isn't exactly easy peasy. everyone makes such comments. that's why the idiot tries to be like everyone else and starts commenting too, except he doesnt know when to stop. (cos he's like socially retarded or something). which makes me wanna bash his head in. plus it's really annoying cos you know he thinks he is so fucking witty. then somehow idiot will manage to find a seat beside a nice quiet girl. he proceeds to try and make her laugh (he probably read somewhere that girls like funny guys). and because she's nice she pretends to laugh a little at his painful jokes. which pushes him into furthur delusion that he is actually funny. and he thinks, 'hey i think i stand a chance with this chick. now, all i have to do is make her laugh harder and maybe she will go out with me'. which is none of my business of course, except that he says his jokes/witty comments just loud enough for the whole room to hear, while acting like he totally didnt mean for anyone else to hear him. NO SUBTLETY MUCH??
and it's bearable if idiot happens to sit in front of me. i just kick his chair really hard. but obviously, this is rarely the case. pardon the angst. i just lost my matric card.
feel my love
wong
Sunday, August 24, 2008
A Time for Self Reflection
It seems that i have a new focus in life, and i hope people would understand and respect that. Suddenly, i've lost interest and motivation in most of the things that in the past two semesters have been what i lived for and i wonder if it's a good or a bad thing.
The past week has enabled me to see the ugly side of humankind right smack in my face not once but twice. It's amazing how people can blatantly exclude you and go about enjoying themselves right in your face and then to top it off, rub it in your face. I just don't understand how people are capable of such apparent disregard for others' feelings. And it's disappointing how those whom you expect to be there for you end up joining the elitist instead.
And you would think that at this age and time, cavemen do not exist anymore but unfortunately they do. It's preposterous and revolting the way they are so out of this world and unreasonable that you actually question their existence.
Then, there are those people who are so delusional you would think they came straight out of a storybook, the way they seem to be so self obsessed, the way they criticise people for the precise, same things that they often commit themselves. And then they come and wonder why so many people dislike them. This should be a wake up call in itself, calling out for self reflection.
And sometimes it seems that everything i do is wrong. It's getting quite tiring, everything.
I guess i am so caught up in wanting everything to be right that i end up doing it all wrongly instead. And i hate it that i just cant find it within me to be a better person in some aspects and this comes at a great cost. I've succeeded in painting a disgusting and hateful picture of myself in front of the person that matters the most to me.
It's so true that there's a limit for everything and as you wonder when everything would fall apart, you continue to unknowingly push the limits day by day.
Jac
The past week has enabled me to see the ugly side of humankind right smack in my face not once but twice. It's amazing how people can blatantly exclude you and go about enjoying themselves right in your face and then to top it off, rub it in your face. I just don't understand how people are capable of such apparent disregard for others' feelings. And it's disappointing how those whom you expect to be there for you end up joining the elitist instead.
And you would think that at this age and time, cavemen do not exist anymore but unfortunately they do. It's preposterous and revolting the way they are so out of this world and unreasonable that you actually question their existence.
Then, there are those people who are so delusional you would think they came straight out of a storybook, the way they seem to be so self obsessed, the way they criticise people for the precise, same things that they often commit themselves. And then they come and wonder why so many people dislike them. This should be a wake up call in itself, calling out for self reflection.
Seriously, sometimes i do wish that everything were a dream.
And sometimes it seems that everything i do is wrong. It's getting quite tiring, everything.
I guess i am so caught up in wanting everything to be right that i end up doing it all wrongly instead. And i hate it that i just cant find it within me to be a better person in some aspects and this comes at a great cost. I've succeeded in painting a disgusting and hateful picture of myself in front of the person that matters the most to me.
It's so true that there's a limit for everything and as you wonder when everything would fall apart, you continue to unknowingly push the limits day by day.
Somehow, everything is not the way it was before.
Jac
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
not.enough.sleep.
cannot snap out of holiday mode.
hall = chalet
if cors were a person i would headbutt him.
wong out
hall = chalet
if cors were a person i would headbutt him.
wong out
Saturday, August 9, 2008
poom!
sch's on monday and i havent gotten all my mods yet. neither have i settled into hall.
but i am ridiculously happy. whole day of softball today. played fine cept my tendacies towards brainless running surfaced a coupla times. jo bought us dinner + damn shiok ice cream + wine and we played taboo. and she wudden let us pay her back cos she's working and we're still stuck in school, she says. i have the bestest coolest senior ever! i feel like i am in sec1 again!
i think the only thing that is bothering me now is stupid cap. i badly wanna go on sep so bad so bad.i dont even care about my grades. i just wanna do well enough to go on xchange.
but i am like grinning to myself right now cos i am so happy. i don't even know why. i must try and remember this feeling. which is why i am writing this post. so that when i get emo i can read this and grin to myself again.
<3333333333333333333333
wong out
but i am ridiculously happy. whole day of softball today. played fine cept my tendacies towards brainless running surfaced a coupla times. jo bought us dinner + damn shiok ice cream + wine and we played taboo. and she wudden let us pay her back cos she's working and we're still stuck in school, she says. i have the bestest coolest senior ever! i feel like i am in sec1 again!
i think the only thing that is bothering me now is stupid cap. i badly wanna go on sep so bad so bad.i dont even care about my grades. i just wanna do well enough to go on xchange.
but i am like grinning to myself right now cos i am so happy. i don't even know why. i must try and remember this feeling. which is why i am writing this post. so that when i get emo i can read this and grin to myself again.
<3333333333333333333333
wong out
Friday, August 8, 2008
life
i've been feeling christmasy for some weird reason. maybe cos i'm 5 yrs behind and just watched this oc episode where they celebtared xmas. or maybe cos yesterday we went to sentosa where the lights were pretty and xmasy.
biz o week is over. yes i am an ogl no laughing. it was surprisingly fun. love my secretly hilarious freshies. hung out with classmates more these coupla weeks than i have in a yr?? met the most interesting peole. good thing i did o week i guess :)) the thing about o week is that everyone is in a good mood and open to talking to people they dont know. even an a-hole like me turns into helpful girl. i brought this exchange student to the dean's office when she just asked me where it was?? hello? next thing u knoe i would be helping old ladies carry their shopping bags. oh wait. i already did that. OMG! what is wrong with me?!
was watching olympic moments. love watching stuff like that. has it occured to u guys that if we were olympic material, beijing2008 would be our olympic debut? (cos we were like underage in 2004 haha). just a random thought. love watching olympics so much especially when they raise the flags and the emotion is so raw.
school is starting too soon, just like i guessed it would. kinda looking forward to it a little, as much as i love the hols. i wish i had more time at home though, cos i've hardly hung out with the siblings. they are out before i wake and asleep before i get home mostly..
when school's out and when school starts i hang out with such totally different groups of people. people i see almost everyday during school we lose contact during the hols, and people who i am with almost everyday(family) or at least every week (chung fong shanny tanz) during the hols i hardly see or are not even in singapore when school starts...
biz o week is over. yes i am an ogl no laughing. it was surprisingly fun. love my secretly hilarious freshies. hung out with classmates more these coupla weeks than i have in a yr?? met the most interesting peole. good thing i did o week i guess :)) the thing about o week is that everyone is in a good mood and open to talking to people they dont know. even an a-hole like me turns into helpful girl. i brought this exchange student to the dean's office when she just asked me where it was?? hello? next thing u knoe i would be helping old ladies carry their shopping bags. oh wait. i already did that. OMG! what is wrong with me?!
was watching olympic moments. love watching stuff like that. has it occured to u guys that if we were olympic material, beijing2008 would be our olympic debut? (cos we were like underage in 2004 haha). just a random thought. love watching olympics so much especially when they raise the flags and the emotion is so raw.
school is starting too soon, just like i guessed it would. kinda looking forward to it a little, as much as i love the hols. i wish i had more time at home though, cos i've hardly hung out with the siblings. they are out before i wake and asleep before i get home mostly..
when school's out and when school starts i hang out with such totally different groups of people. people i see almost everyday during school we lose contact during the hols, and people who i am with almost everyday(family) or at least every week (chung fong shanny tanz) during the hols i hardly see or are not even in singapore when school starts...
it's a whole different mindset. for 3 glorious months u get to be irresponsible and lazy and obnobxious. and then suddenly u have to worry bout getting your internship or if u are missing any deadlines, u obssess about pulling your cap up .. i get such mixed feelings.
i can't ever tell for sure if i am on the right path. am i working on the right things? i just try my best to deal.
wong out
Friday, August 1, 2008
The Dark Knight
I was never a fan of Batman. Come to think of it, i am never really a fan of heroes on the whole since they can be really typical and idealistic. "Spiderman" is about the only superhero movie that i bother spending money on to watch. Oh and "Batman and Robin" which i conveniently had the cheapo, quite bad quality VCD and i also watched it for Poison Ivy. So anyway, fortunately, against my desires this time, i was persuaded to watch the Dark Knight since everyone has been making such a fuss about it and i am seriously glad that i watched it. Those who haven't seriously don't know what they are missing.
"The Dark Knight" basically redefined the term "hero" like never before. Now a "hero" is no longer someone who does stuff like "Oh, i sense someone's in danger, let me change into my redundant costume and attempt to save the person asap and then hurry disappear so i can remain anonymous wooooo" *rolls eyes* Now "hero" stands for whatever the people need him or her to be, even if sometimes it means that he has to be the bad guy instead. Seriously, the plot is really well woven and very intricately done. It is about one of the most meaningful movie i've ever seen. The action is mediocre but the plot and themes more than made it for it. It's definitely award winning but yet not your typical award winning kinda movie which can be really monotonous and climax-less and makes watching painful until after the movie and you think reeeeaaaallly hard about it and get the very abstract message and go woooo. And for once, evil actually won in its own way and then there was the twist which turned around the victory and reduced the damage. Haha ok i totally sound like a movie critique but bottomline is that it's well worth the money and now the Dark Knight is on par with my favourite movie of all time LOTR. Oh and needless to say, Heath Ledger is da bomb. Haha yes Chrystal, stop gloating, i shall admit you have good taste, he really is a damn good actor. What a waste he is dead though, so we cant expect anymore movies from him. Well guess its true, what they say, about how good things never last. He seriously ought to be the first dead person to receive an Oscar man.
Although seriously they shouldn't have changed Katie Holmes to someone i think they think looks like her but in a much uglier n older way. No wonder she died in the movie leh, shit that was mean.
Oh and i like it that Batman has no superpowers. It makes him very human and not only relatable but also possibly prone to all the flaws of human, which is the way a true hero should be.
So my wish finally came true and i finally got to club last Wed. It was quite a disappointment though, due to the presence of certain groups of people there who took up damn alot of space on the dancefloor dancing in big circles and putting their arms around each other with their elbows frantically jutting out and poking everyone near them. How "considerate". And sadly, Arena had some event so we couldn't go there and sponge on the free drinks but Lunar was available though with Ladies' Night and 3 free lycee martini. At first i was totally thinking that 3 lycee martini is totally stingy and pointless since i always go to Arena to drink at least 9 lycee martinis to feel high enough. But ohhhh i was WRONG. The lycee martini in Lunar is damn strong la, like i drank 6 and it was already taking me quite alot of concentration to walk in a straight line. I mean, ya fine, the club's like quite sleazy with like pole dancers and framed huge pictures of naked men and women on the ceiling, but the lycee martini is worth it. Just hurry drink and go out haha. So anw the next day i had a really bad sore throat cos the martini was simply too strong, then again i was shouting and singing at the top of my lungs in the club haha.
One more week to the start of school, sigh, why does time have to pass by so fast.
And i realise i seriously dont understand many things in life and currently, at this stage, i seriously cant be bothered and am not interested. I hope this is what they say it is and it'll pass cos if it doesnt i really dont know what to do. Actually in a way i kinda noe what would happen but i just dont know if i can live with it. And its so true that change is inevitable.
Out,
Jig Jac
"The Dark Knight" basically redefined the term "hero" like never before. Now a "hero" is no longer someone who does stuff like "Oh, i sense someone's in danger, let me change into my redundant costume and attempt to save the person asap and then hurry disappear so i can remain anonymous wooooo" *rolls eyes* Now "hero" stands for whatever the people need him or her to be, even if sometimes it means that he has to be the bad guy instead. Seriously, the plot is really well woven and very intricately done. It is about one of the most meaningful movie i've ever seen. The action is mediocre but the plot and themes more than made it for it. It's definitely award winning but yet not your typical award winning kinda movie which can be really monotonous and climax-less and makes watching painful until after the movie and you think reeeeaaaallly hard about it and get the very abstract message and go woooo. And for once, evil actually won in its own way and then there was the twist which turned around the victory and reduced the damage. Haha ok i totally sound like a movie critique but bottomline is that it's well worth the money and now the Dark Knight is on par with my favourite movie of all time LOTR. Oh and needless to say, Heath Ledger is da bomb. Haha yes Chrystal, stop gloating, i shall admit you have good taste, he really is a damn good actor. What a waste he is dead though, so we cant expect anymore movies from him. Well guess its true, what they say, about how good things never last. He seriously ought to be the first dead person to receive an Oscar man.
Although seriously they shouldn't have changed Katie Holmes to someone i think they think looks like her but in a much uglier n older way. No wonder she died in the movie leh, shit that was mean.
Oh and i like it that Batman has no superpowers. It makes him very human and not only relatable but also possibly prone to all the flaws of human, which is the way a true hero should be.
So my wish finally came true and i finally got to club last Wed. It was quite a disappointment though, due to the presence of certain groups of people there who took up damn alot of space on the dancefloor dancing in big circles and putting their arms around each other with their elbows frantically jutting out and poking everyone near them. How "considerate". And sadly, Arena had some event so we couldn't go there and sponge on the free drinks but Lunar was available though with Ladies' Night and 3 free lycee martini. At first i was totally thinking that 3 lycee martini is totally stingy and pointless since i always go to Arena to drink at least 9 lycee martinis to feel high enough. But ohhhh i was WRONG. The lycee martini in Lunar is damn strong la, like i drank 6 and it was already taking me quite alot of concentration to walk in a straight line. I mean, ya fine, the club's like quite sleazy with like pole dancers and framed huge pictures of naked men and women on the ceiling, but the lycee martini is worth it. Just hurry drink and go out haha. So anw the next day i had a really bad sore throat cos the martini was simply too strong, then again i was shouting and singing at the top of my lungs in the club haha.
One more week to the start of school, sigh, why does time have to pass by so fast.
And i realise i seriously dont understand many things in life and currently, at this stage, i seriously cant be bothered and am not interested. I hope this is what they say it is and it'll pass cos if it doesnt i really dont know what to do. Actually in a way i kinda noe what would happen but i just dont know if i can live with it. And its so true that change is inevitable.
Out,
Jig Jac
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